So...the engine in my car blew...Sad, I know. I am heartbroken. But we are getting it fixed. Jessie is going to try to sell him car and get a motorcycle so he has a way to get places if I have the car. (He RARELY has Sam alone, except on the nights I lead Bible study, and usually just stays home with her those nights anyway.) It is just costing too much for us to insure a car-his Mustang, that never leaves the driveway. Since he has a work van, and my car is a family car and a gas saver, AND his friend, Josh always wants to drive when they go places so he can smoke, that leaves maybe twice a month that it leaves the garage, and we are paying almost $100.00 a month to insure it! vs $15.00 for a little cruiser. Anyway, rant over. We are getting my car fixed. We ordered a motor. It should be here by the 26th, and the guy SAYS he should have it fixed a few days after that.
Unfortunately, this means to pay for what is left over after we sell the Mustang, we won't be able to go on vacation this year. Bleh. Which really sucks. I had it all planned out, and I really wanted to take her before we have another baby. BUT we were planning on camping in Cades Cove, so who says you have to go far for a vacation? We are just going to do what we always do, go camping as much as possible during the warm months. Sam always has fun doing that. And Jessie is going to take off a few days so we can take a longer camping trip, so it is like a vacation. Beach. Fun. Camping. Family. Camp Fire. Smores. Yum. Everything will be okay. :)
On to the GREAT NEWS. Jessie and I are talking more about adopting through foster care. He said we could look more into it, so I did. Then when i told him we would have to go through 20 hours of classroom training, he started joking around saying he didn't have time for that. So I quit looking into it, but last night he started asking all kinds of questions about how we would do it and what we need to pay and when we can get started. I was shocked. Now he is more excited than I am about it.
(I have done the research and talked to DFACS already, you do NOT have to be a foster parent before you adopt a child. It just gives you a better chance because you have them before they have an adoption plan. So even though Jessie did not want to keep a child we could possibly lose after several months, he is considering it now.)
I honestly think that we CAN have more kids, but maybe that is not what we are supposed to do. We started trying last May because I felt like we were being called to have another baby. And when Jessie AGREED after so adamantly being stuck on having ONLY ONE. (Same with me.) I KNEW that we were supposed to have more. With it taking so long, it was discouraging. (Not so much anymore) Because Jessie and I have undergone such a close connection because of it, especially now because we can talk about Lucy. He heard me give my testimony and he still hasn't been the same since. So I thought maybe we were supposed to work all that out before we have another. Now I am not so sure if maybe we aren't MEANT to have another one, but maybe we are supposed to adopt? I have always wanted to. Jessie always said no because he said he would be afraid he wouldn't treat that child the same as his own. Now he is having a change of heart?
I told him to imagine what he went through as a child, which most of you know...But to times that by 10. Then get taken out of your home and put in the home of somebody that you don't know, and then grow up there and 10 other places. Why bring another child in this world if God is calling us to adopt a child who was already born into this world and is suffering? I admire the women who have courage to put their child up for adoption, even the ones through foster care. Because they chose life. And now they realize they are not in the shape they should be to raise a child. I don't mean money. I mean mental state or emotional state...So we are going to see where this leads us. Keep our options open. We may still have one instead of adopting, but we definitely want to look into this too.
We have an orientation coming up. The lady is going to call us with a date soon. :)
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