I went to my Mom's jewelry party last night and there was a two month old there. Let's just say, I am thinking of asking Jessie for another one. lol. Maybe...Anyway, I got to thinking how much things really have changed, an appropriate subject to me since Samantha's 2nd birthday is coming up in 2 weeks.! As a wise Jessie once said, "Oh My Gosh, Brittany, like you are totally right! Three cars and 4 bed sets later, and here we are with spaghetti on our foreheads." He said that on Spaghetti Madness Monday awhile back after I made the comment that so much had changed. We had been through like 3 different cars and 4 comforter sets. But seriously, a lot HAS changed. We have been through so much in 2 years, well, almost 3 if you include me being preggo. When we first brought Sami home, we were clueless. Her clothes were always too big on her and she was so weak, we didn't know how to hold her at first. I wish I would have bonded with her more the first week, but I was hurting and my iron was so low, I couldn't get out of the hospital bed. When I got her home, I had to start homebound. So I held her and all, but it wasn't that "alone, no stress added time" I wanted. So I got ahead in school so I could spend my last week on homebound focusing just on her. It was nice. And when I got back to school, I was still ahead of the game so I got to go to the daycare everyday to see Little Miss Samantha Anne until my class got to where I was at. I hated putting her in daycare. I would visit her all the time. Gosh, looking back on that is so crazy. If Samantha were in daycare now, I would cry. I would hate to wake up every morning knowing that I am just going to have to leave her somewhere to be taken care of, and that is it, taken care of. I wish I could have stayed home from the start. She would have started out with the Love and attention she gets now. BUT, that is just one of many regrets from the beginning. Since then, Jessie and I have switched cars from a '91 Oldsmobile, Achieva (wrecked-totalled), to a '91 Chevy Lumina (broke down), to a '04 Chevy, Aveo (still in tact). We have moved to a full size bed instead of the twin we slept in every night until I had Sami, and then co-slept in it after that for awhile! I have actually learned how to dress her. I look back on some of the clothes I put her in as a Baby and I ask, "Why?" Sort of like we ask our parents when we look at our Baby pictures.I have learned to parent better, and actually changed parenting styles. We have graduated school, gotten married, gone to college, got our own place. And now our dreams are totally changed, for the 5th time in a row. And Now, now my little girl will be 2 and I have no clue as to where the time has went. Where did it go? Does anyone have the answers? Luckily for me, she won't start school until she is six, which gives me another four years before I have to let go, if I can. =) Gosh, I Love her! I can't believe I could ever Love anybody THIS much, because SERIOUSLY, I Love her more every day, and I mean EVERY day. Everytime she smiles at me and makes that kissy face. Everytime she says my name...I have grown to know her. She is going to be a good kid, and I know it is partly because of me. I am SO PROUD! Side Note: Last night she got in BIG trouble and I just was so angry. I wanted to just KEEP getting onto her. But every time I looked in her eyes, I could tell she was sorry. (I think something is going on with her.) And then she smiled real slow and said, "Mamma?" And I said, "Ya, Baby?" And she leaned forward and gave me a BIG hug and kiss and said, "I Yuv You." I cried. lol. It was SO Sweet!
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